In the Himalayas

Running away
from marrying
the man who loves me
I travel
to lose my selfish ego
among the Himalayan mountains

in Kashmir
I encounter a medical missionary
dispensing medications
and Christianity
to sick Muslims

he invites me
to join his mission

sick of myself
I see
an invitation to change
into a good person
caring about others

he sees
my acceptance
as his invitation
to save my soul
meaning
I must surrender my ego
be "One in the Spirit"
believe, think, feel
as he does

he sees Satan
in questions I ask him
in mail I receive
in my talking
with other travelers

he seeks to isolate
suppress my questioning
tame my idiosyncrasy
crush my ego

every skeptical synapse of my soul
looks askance
at the submergence
of being "One in the Spirit"

he threatens that
if I leave
his remote mountain hut,
I will lose all awareness
of the Holy Spirit

I never did like the Holy Ghost
to me it is
Hocus Pocus

but
on this far side of the world
from friends and family
with Whom do I evaluate the risk?
with Whom do I walk out of his orbit
and down the mountain?

Who gives me this certainty
when I now sit alone
under a pine tree
in a valley
of the Himalayas
that I am not lost?

Who pours into me
the Grace I feel
streaming from the cathedral sky?